Knowing the Mirror
by Lana Wood
Summary: Lily Evans is in her sixth year at Hogwarts, trying to find out who she is. The last thing she wants is romantic drama boggling everything up and confusing her, but those darned Marauders have other plans.
1. Mashed Potatoes

**Knowing the Mirror

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I am not Jo Rowling. She owns Harry Potter and all Harry Potter characters. All I own is the un-Jo-owned characters, and a few nice pair of sneakers.

**Summary: **Lily Evans has a dream. She wants to be Head Girl next year at Hogwarts, but everything is going wrong. The current Head Boy and Girl hate her and are trying to get her demoted, and her arch enemy, James Potter, is pushing her red-hot temper to the max, threatening her position as Prefect and her future as Head Girl even more. In the meantime, she's struggling with confusion about her feelings for her ex-boyfriend, who wants to get back together. When her friends start to criticize Lily for her increasingly cynical attitude, she is forced to make some changes. But what changes she should make are all a big blur to her. As she explores herself, trying to find out who she is and what she wants from life, Lily is faced with troublesome questions about love, life and living. But the most troubling question is who that girl is in the mirror...

**Rating: **PG-13 just in case, for mild language, thematic elements, sensuality and violence, which will all be used sparingly but will be present.

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**Chapter One: Mashed Potatoes**

"Petunia!" I groaned as my older sister stopped in front of Kings Cross Train Station. "I must be so bloody late! What's worse is that I don't know _how_ late I am. Are you sure you don't know what time it is?"

"The car clock is broken, and I'm not psychic, Lils," Petunia said irritably.

I froze in shock for a moment.

"Did you just call me 'Lils?'" I asked, my eyes wide.

Petunia and I used to be the best of sisters. We had nicknames for each other-I was Lils and she was Petty. Those nicknames dropped soon after I left for school when I was eleven, and I hadn't even thought of them for, like, five years.

Petunia looked just as surprised as me.  
"I-um…" she blushed uncomfortably. "Lily, get going!" she finally managed to snap. "You can't blame me for your tardiness if your going to sit around asking dumb questions!"

I still gaped at my eighteen year-old sister, but then I realized she was right about my running late.

As I leapt out of the car and grabbed my stuff from the trunk, I was tempted to call her 'Petty' when I said goodbye, but immediately I thought better.

Five minutes later, my luggage loaded onto a trolley, I wheeled through the station hurriedly. Where were all the clocks? How much time did I have to catch the train? I wandered around, looking for Platforms 9 and 10, my sixteen year-old brain working quickly. Platform 3...4...Ugh! 'What time is it?' my mind screamed wildly. If I missed the train, I might as well drop dead.

"Excuse me, sir," I said, tapping a train station worker on the shoulder. "Could you tell me what time it is?"

A middle-aged man in a blue uniform turned and smiled kindly at me. "'Course, ma'am," he glanced at his watch, "it's five minutes to eleven"

I gaped at him.

"Holy-" I quickly stopped myself from swearing and plastered a fleeting smile on my face. "Thanks," I said hurriedly. And I began charging through the train station, my trolley wheeling slightly out of control as I barreled through the jumble of people in Kings Cross.

* * *

I barely made it on time. The train was just starting to puff away, still going pretty slowly, but nevertheless moving, when I finally stepped onboard.

'Dang it,' I thought, furious. 'Some Prefect I am.'

Catching a glimpse of myself in a crooked mirror which was carelessly nailed up onto a compartment door, my jaw dropped. 'Damn, I look awful,' I thought in dismay. My hair became tangled while I rushed to the platform, so the thick, dark red mass now looked untidy and matted. My cheeks were flushed red from the run. For some reason I chose to wear a red t-shirt with my jeans today, resulting in me appearing to be a very ripe tomato as I stared at my reflection in the mirror.

I quickly extracted a miniature hairbrush from my purse and ran it quickly through my hair. I then whipped out my makeup compact and tried to reduce the redness of my face. I checked my reflection again and groaned.

"I still look like a fricken tomato," I muttered to myself furiously.

And to my horror, a voice replied,

"Talking to yourself, Evans?" I caught a glimpse of the despised face in the mirror before I whirled around to face him. He continued, "I know you Mudbloods are stupid, but I didn't realize you lot are mad, as well."

"Hello, Lucius," I said through clenched teeth.

"Why Evans, it appears you've flushed even more scarlet since we last spoke. Your glowing with that Gryffindor-spirited redness." I raised an eyebrow at him. "It almost makes you look like a tomato."

If I wasn't already bright red, I was now. Not only had he heard me talking to myself, but he'd heard specifically what I'd said. Damn it. He continued on. "You'd better get to the meeting. It starts in about thirty seconds," He was smiling contemptuously at me.

I gazed up at the young man who was one year my senior and for a moment the unpleasant thought of how attractive he is crossed my mind. With overgrown, white-blond hair that sweeps over his icy, steel blue colored eyes, a muscular, toned figure, perfect facial features and a pretty line of straight teeth that rarely are revealed behind his full red lips, Lucius Malfoy is one of the hottest guys at Hogwarts. He's also a prejudice git, as I previously mentioned.

"I'm coming, Lucius," I said tightly. "Although I don't know why you care." He laughed coldly.

"You'd better be on-time, Evans, or you may find yourself…demoted." And in a moment that snapped by faster than you could say 'dung bomb,' the incredibly hot git marched away.

I glared after him. I hate Lucius, but to be honest, I'm terrified of him. Whenever he calls me a Mudblood, (which is a foul name for someone born into a Muggle or non-magical family) I ache to slug him and break that perfect nose or those perfect teeth. But he scares the crap out of me.

Wishing I had a watch, I hurried to the Head compartment. I've been late for everything lately, ever since my old watch broke last month. I forgot to remove it when I went swimming with my best friend, Natalie Thomas, at her uncle's manor.

As I hurried down the train, I chided myself furiously.

Being a sixth year and a Prefect, I try to set a good example for the younger students. I mean, you can't lead without doing what you tell others to do. So I try comply with my expectations. I really want to be Head Girl next year, and I know that to become Head Girl, I need to be dedicated, responsible and a good leader.

Unfortunately, almost missing the train on the first day back at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry is not a great way to kick off the year.

And being late for the Prefects meeting wouldn't be a good idea, either. Although how Lucius can say I could be demoted it beyond me.

* * *

I arrived at the Heads compartment, where the Head Boy and Girl were getting ready to lecture the new and returning prefects, right on-time.

When I realized who the new Head Boy was, I nearly wet myself in shock. How Lucius Malfoy landed the job is a mystery to me, even now.

"Evans. Nice of you to join us," he said sleekly. "You just barely made it on-time, lucky for you." Glowering at him, I plopped down next to Alec McGovern, a Hufflepuff Prefect, and listened politely while the Head Girl (Prisillia Hansen, of Ravenclaw) lectured us on all the Prefect responsibilities, school rules, yada yada ya.

The meeting was short, thank Merlin. When it was finally over, I went on a quest to find Natalie and my other friends.

Unfortunately, as I was searching for my friends, a hand clamped over my shoulder. I turned to see a pair of kind, grayish-blue-green eyes smiling nervously at me. Ah, shoot. Remus.

Remus Lupin is a pretty nice looking young man, and what's even better is that he's also the kindest, sweetest boy in the sixth year class. Not to mention he's my one and only ex-boyfriend. We dated for about seven weeks early in our fifth year, but his annoying friends bugged the hell out of me. We wound up getting in a fight about who he cared about more-me or his clique, (known around campus as 'The Marauders'-lame, yes?) And he chose-guess who.

Not that I blame him. I'd choose my friends over him, too. It's not like we were madly in love. So whatever. But it's still strange being around him, because he was like, my first boyfriend and my first kiss, but now that things are over between us, I don't really know what to do around him. It's not comfortable, let me say that.

"Hey Lily," he said softly, smiling at me. I smiled back up at him, although my smile was rather forced.

"Hi, Remus. How are you?" He blushed. (Can you say AWKWARD? Why was he blushing?)

"I'm alright. You?"

"Eh, I'm alive," I said, smiling good-naturedly at him. "Have you seen Natalie?"

He shook his head, his sandy colored hair, longish and shaggy, flying back and forth.

"But I saw Annie and Janna," Remus said. "Up at the front of the train, probably buying food or something."

I opened the next compartment door and peered in. As soon as I realized who was in there, I shut the door quickly.

"There's your crew," I told Remus. "See ya later." And I continued down the corridor.

I found Natalie and Alice just a couple minutes later.

"Hey girls!" I said cheerfully.

"Lily!" Alice squealed, and she jumped up from her seat and hugged me.

"Hey Al!" I said happily, hugging her back. Alice Jensen is _such_ a sweetheart. She's one of my roommates, and is nice to _everyone_. She's not a pushover, though, like many good and decent people tend to be. She's proven herself to be incredibly brave, actually. The summer before fifth year she totally saved like, three peoples' lives. She's kinda like the mother of our dormitory. And what's a bit ironic is that she totally reminds me of Natalie's mum personality-wise, and appearance-wise she reminds me of my mum. She's on the stout side, average height, with a pleasant round face, shoulder length blonde hair and bright blue eyes.

Alice and I didn't get to hang out even once over the summer, so it was our first time seeing each other in nearly three months.  
"How ARE you?" I gushed, pulling away to look at my friend.

"Great! You?"

"I'm alright," I said, grinning. "You're so tan!"

"Frank and I went to Venice for a week, and spent a lot of time in the sun," she said, her eyes sparkling as she said her boyfriend's name.

"So how's Frank doing? Is he going to be able to get through Auror training without you around to 'study' with him?" I teased, grinning as she blushed.

Frank Longbottom graduated last year from Hogwarts. He's been sweet on Alice for a while now, and he asked her out last Easter. That's one reason I didn't see her all summer-she and Frank were inseparable. Natalie and I have bets on when he'll propose: she says Christmas, I say Easter.

After catching up on our latest news, Alice and I sat down on either side of Natalie, who grinned at us.

"Nice to see you, too," she said to me jokingly. I laughed.

"Well I saw _you_, like, two days ago," I said pointedly.

"Right. Some friend _you_ are," Natalie snapped. We both glared at each other for a moment and then burst into laughter.

That's how Natalie and I are. We're crazy, I know, but I guess that's what happens when you have the same best friend for five years. Five going on six. I can't believe how old we're getting.

Natalie Thomas is gorgeous. She's taller than me-she's probably about 5'10" now, which is way taller than even my above average height of 5'7". I think she's the tallest girl in school. (Not surprisingly, her older brother, Jay Thomas, is _the_ tallest person in school, except for Hagrid, of course. Jay's a seventh year, and is the captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.)

Natalie has long, silky black hair that she wears in hundreds of little braids, and her skin tone is a rich, deep brown. Everything about her is perfect-her white teeth, her full lips, her thoughtful eyes. Of course, being human, Natalie says she's not happy with her looks, and always tries to find fault with herself, which I think is impossible. She's in great shape, too. Like Jay, she plays Quidditch. So basically, if Natalie wasn't my best friend, I'm sure I'd hate her, because she's flawless.

"Lil-lil," Natalie said, recovering from our rather random outburst of laughter. "You look cute today."

I nearly blanched at her complement.

"Are you kidding? I look like a tomato!"

"Nah, you're too skinny to be a tomato," Natalie said. "Maybe a squashed tomato, though."

Alice snorted.

"So squashed tomatoes are cute?" I said, feigning hurt at my best friend's cruelty.

"In comparison with your usual appearance, probably," Natalie said.

I whacked her in the arm.

"That was harsh!" I cried. "I'm leaving! I won't take such abuse any longer!"

"Where will you go?" Alice asked, looking amused.

"I'll-I'll go join the Marauders! And become the first Marauder-ette of the group!" I cried dramatically.

This, of course, provoked more laughter.

"Can you imagine!" Natalie gasped through her giggles.

"Oh Merlin! Lee-lee, that is probably my best joke ever!" I said, laughing uncontrollably.

So I know it wasn't that funny. But Natalie (who I call Lee-lee on occasion; she calls me Lil-lil sometimes) and I have long despised the Marauders, (at least, as a group,) and picturing me-or any girl, but especially me-joining their ranks was funnier than you can imagine. Just trust me.

I was nearly hyperventilating, I was laughing so hard. Natalie was saying she was going to pee on herself. Alice was watching us, amusement shining in her bright blue eyes. And then our compartment door crashed open.

"You two are _so_ loud!" Janna moaned. The three of us looked up to see Janna and Annie entering the compartment. They're our two other roommates at school.

Janna used to be my acclaimed archenemy, but over the last couple years things between us have definitely gotten better. Not good, but better. And Annie, being Janna's best friend, isn't really on _my_ list of best friends, but the two are tolerable. They gossip more than anyone I know, and their obsessions with certain things really bothers me. But I don't hate them or anything.

"Hi guys," I said.

"Hey Lily," they chorused, and then the two sat down across from Alice, Natalie and me and began munching on Cauldron Cakes, whispering about something that I couldn't care less about.

I turned to Natalie and Alice, and we all exchanged knowing looks, rolling our eyes at Janna and Annie.

"So, whose the new Head Boy and Girl?" Alice asked. I groaned. I had been trying to forget.

"Oh Merlin. Tell me it's not Malfoy," Natalie spat. When I didn't reply, her dark brown eyes got big and she groaned.

We spent the rest of the train ride bashing Lucius Malfoy. At one point Janna and Annie joined in the gossip fest, as gossiping is what they do best. (Actually, I think it's _all_ they do.)

"Once he asked me to meet him in the Astronomy Tower," Janna announced.

"Sick. He's snogged about every girl in the school up there. And sometimes more than snogged," Natalie said, shuddering a bit.

"You said no, right Janna?" I asked, a bit worried. Let's just say Janna has a bit of a reputation.

She looked rather awkward for a moment.

"Oh Merlin. Please tell me you didn't meet him," Alice said, her round face worried.

"Well, I was a fourth year," Janna said innocently. Natalie, Alice and I all groaned.

"Janna, that's disgusting! What happened?" I demanded, not really wanting to know.

"Oh, nothing like that," she said quickly. Janna tucked a lock of golden-blonde hair behind her ear and her brown eyes tactfully avoided our stares.

Janna's measurements must be similar to a Barbie doll's, I swear, except she's an inch or two shorter than me and her feet are gigantic. What's crazy is that she's looked like a Barbie ever since first year. Big chest, nearly a non-existent waist, full hips and skinny legs. But I'm not jealous of her, because that's all people (more specifically, guys) see when they see Janna, is her body and her seductive eyes. And trust me-it's gotten her into trouble. So do I mind being skinny and basically flat-chested, with abnormal, oversized, bright green eyes? If so, I won't admit it.

"Nothing like what?" Alice inquired, worry written all over her face.

"We just talked a little," Janna began. Annie snorted. Glaring at her, Janna continued, "Well, maybe not very much at all. And then we kissed and stuff like that…"

"Ugh, is there a trash can in here? I think I'm gonna hurl," I announced.

Natalie looked disgusted as she listened to Janna.

"That's not a nice scene to picture," she announced. "Janna! Why did you do that? How can you sleep at night knowing that you snogged that dirt bag?"

Janna tried to look ashamed, but she failed miserably.

"You guys," she said, her brown eyes suddenly sparkling mischievously. She leaned forward and spoke quietly. "I know this is bad, but…I totally don't regret it. If Lucius Malfoy asked me to meet him again, I would say yes in a heartbeat. I know he's a prejudice bigot and a player and all, but he is SUCH a good kisser, and when he put his hand-"

"Stop!" I yelled, covering my ears. "I don't want to hear it!" Janna leaned back, grinning sheepishly.

"Sorry," she said in a very un-sorry voice. "But just remember, if you ever want a good, sensual kiss…"

"That's enough, Janna," Alice said, taking on her bossy, almost motherly tone.

I couldn't help but smile at Natalie as Janna shut her mouth obediently. I don't know why Alice is always so successful in bossing us around-you'd think it would annoy us all and make us hate her, but it doesn't. She'll be one heck of a mother someday.

Annie was talking excitedly now.

"I heard a rumor that Lucius and Professor McGonagall are having a rendezvous!" she exclaimed. I shook my head pityingly.

"Annie, please tell me you don't believe that. It's probably the most pathetic piece of gossip I've ever heard you cotton to." Annie's black eyes looked reproachful.

"I heard it straight from Prissy Hansen," she said.

Natalie, Alice and I laughed.

"Now _that _I believe," Natalie said.

"She saw them!" Annie exclaimed.

Annie Ling is one of the better students in our year. Frankly, I was astonished that she was so earnest about such a ridiculous rumor. She looked furiously from me to Natalie to Alice, and then at Janna, pleading for help.

"Prisillia Hansen _is_ Head Girl," Janna said. Annie nodded quickly.

"We believe that she told you," Alice said swiftly, trying to make peace. "And I suppose anything's possible."

I snorted.

"Except for that," Natalie muttered. Annie crossed her arms and remained silent for the rest of the trip. When she's upset, she looks younger than usual, which is hilarious, as she's already short-probably only just over five feet tall. Her lower lip naturally pouts out and her eyes get all sulky, so when Annie pouts, she looks six instead of thirteen, like she usually does, and in reality she's nearly seventeen.

* * *

When we finally arrived at Hogwarts, I was starving.

"I hope there aren't many first years to sort," I muttered to Natalie as we stood up and stretched. "I want to get right to the feast."

"I heard there's a lot," Alice said. "But that was just from some third year. Third years always talk bad about first years, and really, I don't know how he'd know."

Unfortunately, this third year was correct. There was a plethora of first years. By the time "Zurfluh, Howard" was sorted into Hufflepuff, I thought my stomach would shrink into oblivion, it was so deprived. Fortunately, Dumbledore is impeccably intuitive, and seemed to realize my plight, so he cut his normal welcome speech down into about four sentences. And then, with the wave of his hand, food appeared on the four house tables, so abundantly I could hear the table legs groaning and creaking in agony. But I didn't mind. There was food! I could sing praise, I was so pleased.

As I loaded enough mashed potatoes onto my plate to feed all of Iceland, I became aware of a pair of eyes watching me. I hate it when people watch me. It annoys me almost as much as that Marauder group Remus is a part of annoys me. So when a Marauder is watching me, I am twice as irritable. Hence the reason James Potter's attention irked me so.

James Potter is the co-leader of the pathetic band that calls themselves "the Marauders." He is arrogant and cocky and as stupid as a codfish. And he's always asking me out, just to bother me. I don't think he even likes me-it just bothers his arrogant mind to think that some girl isn't dying to date him, so he follows me around, trying to charm me. Therefore, I can't stand him.

He's not bad looking or anything. He's tall, which is nice, and has messy black-brown hair and hazel eyes with a dark brown ring around the outside and dark flacks mingled in with the hazel of his eyes, broad shoulders and a strong jaw. (Not that I've ever looked that closely at him.)

He also wears glasses, which make him look smart. And he _is _smart, in an idiotic sort of way. Anyway, the point is, I hate James Potter. So as he watched me pile potatoes onto my plate, I grew very angry. I have a nasty temper-what can I say? The red hair stereotype cashes in as true for me.

"What's wrong, Potter?" I snapped, throwing the potato spoon into the bowl and glaring at him over my mountain of food.

He just grinned in a pathetic, supposedly seductive manor, not wavering under my angry green eyes, which Natalie says are really scary when I'm mad or annoyed.

Naturally, this irked me even more.

"Is something funny?" I snarled. (Whoa, yeah, maybe I was overreacting.)

"No, Evans. Nothing is wrong," James said sweetly. "I was just observing your beauty, and admiring your healthy appetite."

Yes, I'm skinny. I don't think I'm fat or anything, honest. But before my insane growth spurt, I was a little on the chunky side. So I'm still a little bit sensitive about weight/fat/appetite comments. So you can't blame me for what I said next.

"You know what, Potter?" I huffed. "My 'healthy appetite' has suddenly disappeared, quite possibly due to the unpleasant sight of your oversized head."

(Of course, that was all bull crap-in truth, my appetite was still quite healthy, and James's head has never really been all that revolting to me.)

James chuckled.

"Too bad, Evans. I was looking forward to seeing you stuff all that down. You might benefit a little from a good meal." I saw his eyes dart momentarily to my chest, and that's when it happened. I nearly exploded.

'James Potter's eyes cannot linger on my flat chest when he talks about me benefiting from a healthy appetite!' my offended, angry red-haired conscience yelled.

Any idiot knows that I'd have to eat a LOT of potatoes to gain a cup size. But the implication alone was infuriating. Yes, it was subtle, but I swear to you, James was thinking thoughts that I was far from being okay with.

Before I could think twice about it, I was on my feet, my dinner plate in hand, and with one heavy slosh, the mass of potato flew from my plate to James Potter. And, by luck I suppose, the load of mashed, fluffy starch propelled through the air, aiming right into his nicely chiseled face.

I never thought of James as a tan or dark skinned person, but in contrast to his coloring when covered with potato, I would have to say that he's got a pretty deep tan.

I couldn't help but laugh at him as I grabbed an entire basket of dinner rolls from the table and waved goodbye to Natalie and Alice, leaving James to sputter and swear furiously as I departed early for my dormitory. (Good thing I'm a Prefect and already knew the password to the Gryffindor Common Room.)

* * *

So maybe you're wondering how I became a Prefect, as thus far, in one day, I've nearly missed a train, barely made it to the most important Prefect meeting of the year, gossiped unkindly about both the Head Boy and Girl, called my peers names and wasted enough potatoes to feed all of Iceland on a dirty boy who looked at my chest and made a jerky comment.

Unfortunately, if you _are_ wondering, you'll soon find that others were unsure of my worthiness to be a Prefect as well. Not that I'm unworthy. I'm _totally _worthy. James Potter totally deserved to have potatoes thrown in his face, and it was totally Petunia's fault that I was late, and Lucius Malfoy is totally a git…But as McGonagall said the next morning,

"Excuses are like armpits, Miss Evans. Everyone has them, and they all stink."

I guess my armpits smelled really bad.

* * *

_**A/N:**_ Yay! New fic! Alrighty, well you know the deal. Please drop me a line or two, tell me what you're thinking. I love to hear from readers. So go ahead and review! Brownies to you all!

Readers who have also read my almost-complete fic _Eyes Like Yours_ will recognize many of the characters I created in Lily's diary in _ELY _here. It also goes with _The Parting of Brothers_, but you don't need to read any of my other fics to follow the story-line easily.

_NEXT CHAPTER:_

_McGonagall gives Lily a talking to_

_We meet yet another Marauder_

_Lily and Natalie get some bad news_

_Annie finds a boyfriend..._

Thanks for reading!

_Laney-Wood :)_

* * *


	2. Flirting With Demotion

**

* * *

Chapter Two: Flirting With Demotion **

Professor McGonagall's respect for me has been a very dynamic thing over the years. I think she hated me my first year. And my second year she didn't trust me. Third year she tolerated me. Fourth year she praised me. Fifth year she grew to respect me. Of course, on the first day of my sixth year, what has to happen? Naturally, I pulled a 'Lily' and screwed it all up.

"I don't know what to think, Miss Evans!" Professor McGonagall snapped as I shrank into my chair in terror while in her office the morning of September 2. "You're a _Prefect_! And you _threw_ potatoes at a fellow student because he said you're _skinny_? What if a food fight erupted? It would've been entirely your fault!"

Geez. I didn't think it was _that_ big of a deal.

"He was sexually harassing me!" I whined. McGonagall narrowed her dark eyes at me.

"You didn't mention that before. What did he say?"

I wished that James had said something blatantly vulgar, strangely enough. Sighing, and wishing I could lie, but knowing I couldn't, I slowly began to speak.

"Nothing, really…but he _looked_ at me, and"

"So you threw potatoes at him?" McGonagall cried exasperatedly.

My stomach suddenly grumbled disturbingly.

McGonagall gave me an odd look and sighed dramatically.

"Miss Evans, I suspect that what happened last night will not occur again."

I shook my head quickly.

"No, ma'am, it won't," I said fervently.

"Good. Because any more misbehavior on your part will result in immediate demotion from your position as Prefect."

My jaw dropped, (Don't you think demotion is a little extreme? It was just potatoes, for Merlin's sake!) but I quickly regained my composure and tried to look indifferent.

"That's alright, Professor, because yesterday was a most unfortunate day, and I see no reason for today to be similar."

"I certainly hope you're right," she said curtly. I forced a smile at my Head of House and stood.

"I'll see you this afternoon in class, Professor," I said diplomatically, sucking up, as I was on the brink of demotion. She nodded absentmindedly.

"Yes dear. And good luck getting along with Mr. Potter."

I felt myself pale at the thought of being pleasant to that scumbag.

"Oh, don't worry. I won't even talk to him," I promised.

"I would think that unwise, Miss Evans," McGonagall said as I turned to leave. Glancing over my shoulder curiously, I cocked an eyebrow.

"Oh? And why? I won't be unkind, and I swear to avoid mashed potatoes when he's near." McGonagall chuckled. (I think I'm the only student whose ever been able to make her laugh out loud. I'm actually quite proud of the fact.) Clearly the potato scene amused her. However, she quickly returned to being stern, and explained.

"Because, Miss Evans. This year is your sixth year. And sixth years traditionally receive study groups, based on who they share the most similar schedules with. And your group happens to consist of" (Oh Merlin, I'd forgotten. I knew damn well what was coming…) "Miss Thomas, Mr. Gladstone, Mr. Black and Mr. Potter."

"Not Remus?" I asked, alarmed. McGonagall almost smiled. She's hinted toward Remus and me having a relationship ever since fourth year. She was ecstatic when we actually began going out, (although she masked it well. She has to keep up that stern-teacher façade she's become so well known for) and was disappointed when Remus chose the Marauders over me.

"No, dear. Mr. Lupin is continuing in History of Magic, and doesn't take Astronomy, so his group consists of Alec McGovern and a few Ravenclaws."

I've always heard that the traditional "sixth year study groups" totally suck. There's been talk of erasing the program for a few years now. Rumor has it that this is Hogwart's last year with the program, which sucks for me, but I suppose it will be good for future generations.

The study groups are basically made up of people who share similar career interests. Students are required to meet with their groups for at least five hours a week to discuss homework, career planning and prospective jobs. And it's graded, like a normal class. There's even an end-of-the-year exam.

Fortunately, Natalie and I both wanted to pursue something involving law (what specifically, we weren't sure), but we were wary to admit it when we heard that the Marauders had similar aspirations. I always assumed that Remus and Peter Pettigrew would follow James and Sirius Black's footsteps. Weird. I made a mental note to ask Remus sometime why the Marauders weren't all in the Law study group.

"So you and Mr. Potter will need to become much more considerate of each other. What a pity it would be to get a failing grade in Career Study Group. I expect that by the end of the year, the two of you will be friends." I laughed out loud.

"Good one, Professor," I said, ignoring her 'I'm-not-kidding' look as I headed out of her office.

* * *

"How was your meeting with the Grinch?" Janna asked as I joined her and Natalie in the Great Hall for breakfast. I don't know why Janna hates McGonagall so much. She's just a stern-looking teddy bear with a high IQ and a dry sense of humor. Although I suppose mostly everyone dislikes her except for me. 

I ignored the rude name she used for McGonagall and told her and Natalie about my threat of demotion. Janna seemed to find it very funny, (probably because she's James's cousin and absolutely adores him, and thrives on getting in trouble and bending rules as far as they go. It's apparently a "Potter thing") but Natalie sympathized, and helped me call James names for the rest of breakfast.

I managed to get through the day alright, probably because James was avoiding me. This was of no concern to me, of course. But the next day, when our study groups were announced, we were both forced out of our oaths of silence.

* * *

"Isn't it odd that four Gryffindors should land a study group together?" Sirius Black mused as he, James, Natalie and I gathered around our group table in the library. 

"Incredibly ironic," I said sarcastically.

"No, it really is!" Sirius said cheerfully.

"Kelso Gladstone's in our group to, Bighead," Natalie reminded him, rolling her eyes. "And he's no Gryffindor."

Sirius tried to look hurt, his dark eyes sparkling nonetheless and betraying him.

I had a huge crush on Sirius for my first two or three years of school. What can I say? He _is_ really hot. Natalie's had a crush on him ever since she first saw him. So I eventually decided he wasn't worth liking if it would cause competition between my best friend and me. Especially since Sirius Black's the ultimate player.

You'd never guess Natalie likes him. She calls him 'Bighead,' and she even turned him down when he asked her out once, sometime in fourth year, I think. Go figure.

I mentioned before that Natalie and I despise the Marauders as a group. However, when its just Remus, I'm content. Natalie likes Remus enough, too. And Natalie quite enjoys being around Sirius when his stupid friends aren't around. But that's the problem. The stupid clan of boys is inseparable.

"Well Kelso Gladstone isn't here, is he?" Sirius said, looking pleased. "So I'm right. Four Gryffindors." James, Natalie and I all stared blankly at him.

Sirius was especially talkative today. His dark hair, worn in that sexy, shaggy style that was getting to be so popular, bounced all over as he moved his head from James to Natalie to me, trying to engage at least one of us in a conversation.

"So how about that dung bomb the first years set off in the third floor bathrooms?"

Natalie and I pulled faces, and James remained silent, studying his hands.

"Er, alright. I thought it was pretty impressive that the first years had the guts to do it…" Sirius trailed off, clearly not enjoying his conversation with himself. "It looks like we've got an exciting year ahead of us, being a study group and all," he said, sarcastic now.

Natalie sighed dejectedly. "Maybe I'll change to the Magical Medicine group."

"Hey Ropehead, you can't do that!" Sirius cried. "We'll have loads of fun, as soon as James and Lily here finally admit their undying love for each other and snog it out."

My stomach lurched.

"Ugh, Sirius, you're the most revolting child ever," I moaned, sinking back into my chair miserably.

"Did you just call me _'Ropehead?'_" Natalie asked Sirius, her dark eyes narrowed and her voice dangerous.

"New nickname. I'm Bighead, you're Ropehead." Sirius grinned merrily at his own genius, and I cocked an eyebrow at Natalie, who just shook her head and sighed dramatically.

I could tell she was thinking, 'If I wasn't so crazy about him, he'd be so dead for that.' I winked at Natalie and she gave me a miserable grin that clearly said, 'Why do I like this moron!'

"So, Lily. I think Prongs would really appreciate it if you apologized for smashing potatoes into his face the other night, and then I think we could function like a normal group," Sirius said.

Oh Merlin. Not the nicknames again. The Marauders have a bunch of pathetic nicknames for each other.

They're so stupid, you think you're hearing things wrong when you hear them. I've always wondered where in the heck they came from.

Honestly…Moony, Padfoot, Prongs and Wormtail? What the hell brought those names on?

Moony is Remus. Maybe he mooned his stupid friends once?

Padfoot is Sirius. Wears shoe cushions?

Prongs…oh Merlin, I can't even imagine where James got that one.

And Wormtail is Peter Pettigrew. He has a rather rat-like nose, so I guess that one fits.

"No we couldn't. This has got to be the most screwed up study group ever," Natalie said. "_You're_ in it."

Sirius looked offended, and turned his dark grayish eyes into dramatic pools of hurt and curled out his lower lip into a pout.

"I'm just trying to make peace, Ropehead," he moaned. "Why must you lash out at me so?"

"Why must you annoy me so?"

"Why must you provoke me so?"

"Why must I be stuck here with you morons?" I interrupted in my best whine, knowing this could go on forever and hoping to make Natalie and Sirius stop.

"It's because of you, Lily-kins," Sirius said affectionately. "It's because of you and your stubborn-ness that this group is doomed to failure and lack or productivity."

"Excuse me?" I narrowed my eyes at him, but Sirius hardly flinched.

"You heard me. It's because you're too damn stubborn to admit that you love James here, or even apologize for throwing potatoes at him, that we will never succeed."

"I do NOT love your moronic friend, Black," I said indignantly. "He's the most disturbing boy I know. And as for the potatoes…"

But before I could finish, I was rudely interrupted.

"And as for the potatoes, I don't mind so much anymore," James announced.

Sirius, Natalie and I all froze at this and stared at James like he was mad.

For one, he spoke. We all assumed he'd taken an oath of silence for the day.

And for two, he'd announced that he wasn't holding a grudge. Extremely out of character for him. I was immediately suspicious.

"Yes you do, mate," Sirius said, his dark, almost black eyes astonished.

"No I don't. I talked to Annie this morning, and she said that Lily here is having some girl problems, and I've decided to forgive and forget, because I'm a caring, sensitive man."

Oh, I wanted to punch that face of his so bad right then. Wipe that new grin from his mouth.

"Wait, mate," Sirius was saying. "I saw you talking to Annie Ling this morning! And I forgot to ask why you didn't even bother to tell me"

"Oh yeah, sorry Padfoot!" James said. He suddenly was grinning like a fool. Men say women have mood swings. I've never seen a woman morph moods like James Potter, though. "Annie and I are back together."

This was surprising news. Annie and James have probably gone out at least once every year since first year. And they always break up dramatically and loudly in the Great Hall during a meal. Last year's breakup was so bad, though, we all thought the two were officially over forever.

What was even more surprising was the strange feeling I got in my stomach when James announced that he and Annie were together again. It wasn't normal. And I was really worried as soon as I got it.

Suddenly, a gigantic boy joined us. Kelso Gladstone is extremely charismatic, and is friends with everyone at Hogwarts, or is at least nice to them. He's almost as tall as Jay Thomas, and weighs about 350 pounds, I would guess. He's enormous. His hair is naturally a mousy brown color, but he magically dyes it to match his socks. Today it was green, with yellow streaks. And, consequently, he was wearing green and yellow striped socks, that showed a bit underneath his too-short slacks. Kelso's a strange kid, but you've gotta love him. He has a hilarious accent. His mother is from France, and his father grew up in American Texas. So Kelso has a slight drawl with his strong French accent.

"Sorry I'm late, y'all," he said.

"S'all good, Gladstone," Sirius said easily.

"Hey, I didn't know you were into law enforcement," James said curiously. Kelso beamed and nodded.

"I don't know if I'll get into ze Auror program, though," he said glumly.

"What?"

"You're smart, Kelso," Natalie said. "Why wouldn't you get it?"

"I 'eard zey 'ave a rule that if yer weight is over some ratio to your 'eight ya can't join up."

"That's discrimination!" I cried. "If that's true, it's totally wrong, Kelso."

He shrugged glumly.

"If I can't be an Auror, I'll work fer ze Ministry, I suppose." Sirius and James exchanged looks, and for a moment I thought something serious and intelligent may've passed between them. But I was wrong.

The rest of the study group hour was a blur to me. After James came out of his quiet shell, he and Sirius had a grand time and annoyed Natalie and me a whole bunch. He and Sirius seemed determined to cheer up Kelso, as well, which worked pretty well, although Kelso asked them to be nicer to us girls more than once. By the end of the session, me and Lee-lee were utterly disgusted with the two young men (not Kelso, obviously).

That night, Natalie was grumpy, which happens rarely. Of course, the two idiots in our study group were to blame. And the worst part was that I couldn't even slam James Potter's wand up his nose, because I was inches away from demotion.

* * *

Annie annoyed the hell out me that night while I was trying to do my Potions essay and forget the awfulness of the day. She began telling animatedly about James asking her out again. And then Janna pitched in with news that Gideon Prewett, a fifth year Gryffindor boy, asked her out during lunch. I really don't care about those two and who they date, but tonight it really irked me. I guess I may've been jealous. Not of who they were dating, but more of the fact that they were dating and I wasn't. And in my defense, I was having a rough time of the month. So I lashed out and acted kind of like a witch (the mean kind). 

"You're dating Gideon this week?" I snorted. "A fifth year? Geez, Janna, run out of choices your own age?"

Janna rolled her eyes at me.

"Go take a Midol," she snarled.

"Whatever," I said, returning to my essay. _Bullstow weed and crushed beetle are simmered together in a cauldron at 400 degrees Celsius, and then the cauldron is rotated 240 degrees west…_

But Janna wasn't in the mood to let me be rude without receiving rudeness in return.

"Gideon's a very mature fifth year, Lily. You're just jealous because James Potter's over you since last year, and nobody else wants to date you, with that red-hot temper of yours and that goody-two-shoes attitude. Not to mention you're not nearly as pretty as you could be. Your looks have depreciated a lot since last year. Which is probably the reason you try to act like you don't care that you haven't had a nice snog in months."

_Inches away from demotion. Cannot punch her. Inches away from demotion. Must resist urge to brutally injure James Potter's slut of a cousin. Inches away…inches away…_

I was inches away from slugging Janna Carter, cousin of my arch enemy, for saying such awful things to me, for making my eyes sting with tears that I had to fight to hold back, because even Janna wasn't usually so harsh…_inches away_, and I was seriously about to dislocate that girl's jaw, but then I was saved.

Natalie had been lying on her bed, trying to read, but probably really just thinking about what a prat Sirius is. But when I started harassing Janna, she closed her book wearily, very aware of my sharp-tongued ways. And when Janna said all that, she sat up quickly and glanced at me to see my reaction. And when she saw me struggle to restrain myself, she jumped up and whirled on Janna.

"What the hell's your problem?" Natalie snapped. "Maybe that wasn't very nice of Lily to make fun of you for dating a younger guy, but good Merlin, Janna, grow up!"

Natalie's face was red, and her shoulders heaved like they do after she goes on a hard run. She looked very tired and very tense. It had been a rough day for both of us. I glanced at Janna, who avoided my eyes, and she muttered something about "Whatever…jealous…stupid…giraffe." Annie's dark eyes were big, and she looked shocked by what she's just seen. Alice was looking from Natalie to Janna to me nervously.

Janna and I used to be arch enemies. But even back then, I don't think she ever said anything that mean to me. We usually just talked about each other behind each other's backs. After all, that's the easiest thing you can do. But this marked our first fight where we said rude things to each other.

And Natalie never yells at anyone except for Sirius. And she rarely swears. So that was a first, too.

Janna stood up and muttered something to Annie and left the dormitory. I sank onto my bed, feeling awful. She was right. I looked awful since last year. Looking in the mirror was always a painful reminder. My enormous cat eyes, my hideous hair that was always in need of a good shampooing, and my dark freckles…and that long nose and those teeth that weren't straight on the bottom, and the fat ankles…

_Your ankles aren't fat, you moron, _the voice inside my head snapped.

_Whatever_, I snapped back to myself.

* * *

A few days later I was sitting with Natalie and a couple of friends in Ravenclaw by the lake. We were enjoying what was rumored to be the last warm day of the year, gossiping and telling stories about boys, teachers and annoying girls. And then the conversation took a most unpleasant turn. 

"So I heard Janna say that you're trying to steal Annie's boyfriend," Rhanda Filch said. I rolled my eyes as Carolyn King raised her eyebrows.

"Gideon Prewett?" she said. "That annoying fifth year?"

Rhanda sighed, irritated. "No. James Potter."

"He and Annie are back together?" Carolyn said. "I can't believe it! I thought they were finally done!"

Rhanda shook her head.

"How do you feel about that, Lil?" Carolyn asked, her dark eyes probing. I huffed irritably.

"I think they're perfect together," I said sarcastically. "Actually, I do. They both annoy the heck out of me."

Carolyn and Rhanda exchanged looks, and then giggled. I frowned deeply at them and turned to Natalie.

"Was that funny?" I demanded. She grinned at my expression but quickly became serious.

"Not really," she said sincerely. "But you know how it is. You hate James Potter so much, everyone assumes you really secretly love him, because imagining you really truly hating someone that much is difficult for most people. After all, they usually see you as a loving, kind, compassioning sweetheart."

Rhanda and Carolyn are both about average height, but aside from that, they remind me a lot of myself and Natalie. Rhanda has brown hair with a tinge of red, hazel eyes and freckled, creamy skin. Carolyn has dark brown hair that she wears long, dark brown eyes and a more olive-tinged skin tone.

They're both extremely intelligent, and Carolyn's a Prefect. Although both of them have Prefect characteristics. So not only do they look similar to Natalie and me, but they're also overall "good girls" who get good marks. Just like me and Natalie, apparently.

Therefore, whenever they say something extremely contrary to what Natalie or I would say, or that confuses me, it throws me a little, because we usually understand each other pretty well.

"Lil, if you liked James, would you admit it?" Carolyn suddenly asked.

I was stunned for a moment. Was this a trick question? I thought carefully before answering.

"If I did, I'd admit it to _you_ girls, at least."

"Would you really?" Carolyn inquired. "Think about it, Lil. Pretend that tomorrow morning you woke up and your first thought was, 'Oh Merlin, I really do love James Potter!' would you admit it?"

I frowned.

"That's a dumb question, Carolyn," I said. "I don't know, because that's never happened. Nor will it ever."

She smiled, looking pleased.

"Then maybe you're denying it right now. But deep down, you love him."

Rhanda and Natalie exchanged looks. They knew this could be dangerous.

"Carolyn, we all know Lily hates James," Natalie said softly.

"And even if she and him would be absolutely adorable together, he's kinda been an arse to her," Rhanda added.

"That's just because he's a dung-brained boy," Carolyn said. "Just like Gideon and Fabian Prewett. You know what happened the other day?" And she preceded to tell us all about how Gideon and his older brother Fabian, whose a seventh year Gryffindor, set off sprinklers in the Potions dungeon. The spraying water had broken many flasks of potions and caused toxic fumes to circulate all over. The two boys apparently escaped punishment, though.

"They told Dumbledore some BS story about needing to prevent someone from sneaking into the dungeons from some underground passageway that night," Rhanda said. "It was totally mad, but he bought it."

"You can't complain about students getting off easy, Rhanda," Natalie smirked. "With your uncle working here, you get it so lax. You've got your Uncle Filch wrapped around your little finger."

Rhanda grinned sheepishly.

"Yeah, I guess I kinda do. But Dumbledore's the headmaster, not the caretaker. And he's not related to the Prewetts."

I stretched out on my back and let the warm sunrays penetrate into my skin, hoping for a tan.

"Dumbledore probably believed them," I said. "He's very trusting, unless given reason not to trust someone."

Rhanda lied down next to me, and Natalie and Carolyn took off their shoes to dangle their toes in the lake.

"Anyone hear about the new Giant Squid breeding arena in Rome?" Carolyn asked.

"Er, no. I think you're probably the only one," Natalie said, looking at Carolyn strangely. Carolyn's favorite course is Care of Magical Creatures. We all think she's a bit crazy, but she wants to be a Veterinarian someday, and take care of magical pets, so she likes to read up on weird stuff like that.

"How old do you think the Giant Squid here is?" Natalie asked her. Carolyn considered this.

"Four hundred and twenty seven," she finally announced.

"Have you been reading the Daily Prophet?" Rhanda asked seriously, turning her hazel eyes to meet mine.

I shook my head. "I hate that paper. It's extremely bias. So many pureblood maniacs support it, I can't stand to read it."

"There's some weird stuff going on. Some weird dark wizard named Voltymord or something is apparently causing some trouble. Not much, mind you, but I heard that Dumbledore's working with the Ministry to stop him before he gets powerful, and that he actually tortured a half blood family last week."

"That's terrible!" Natalie exclaimed.

"Yeah, people are so twisted these days. What's wrong with the world?" I said glumly.

"Well, good always conquers evil," Carolyn said. "Sometimes it takes a while, but the good always comes out on top."

I considered this for a moment. I thought of James and Annie passionately kissing in the hallway. Definitely evil. Especially those two. Ugh.

And me. Definitely good. If Carolyn was right, it was quite comforting to know that I'd eventually come out above those two arrogant beasts.

* * *

**A/N: Thanks ever so much to you awesome reviewers!**

**fire-icecat:** Ah, I'll try and pick it up. Thank you!

**TinaGina:** Nice guess. You were close.

**dancegirl1152:** Whoa, a review from you! I am shock-ed! Thank you! Check out the new character name, just for you…

**fly-away-free:** Thank you! I think I like that idea…but first the animosity between them should simmer down. Or maybe not. But saying no to Malfoy would definitely take a lot ;)

**Auramistealia:** Aw, you liked the mashed potatoes! Thanks! I just had to do it.

**The all mighty and powerfulM**: Thanks for the review!

**KMK:** Thanks for checking out this story! Let me know how I'm doing?

**MsMissProngs:** Thanks!

Reviews rock my world! So if you have time, maybe **review this chapter**?…And if not, I still love ya for reading! Thank you, and sorry this took a while to post. I'll be finishing ELY in the next week or two, by the way.

* * *

**Next Chapter: **Get pumped up for the first Quidditch game of the year! And watch out for strange new romantic developments... 

Thanks again for reading. :)

* * *


	3. The Rain from Spain that Came

Howdy, all! Sorry it's been awhile. I was exiled from the computer for a couple weeks, so I apologize. Firstly, thanks to all who reviewed since my last post. I love ya guys!

And now, the VERY anticipated:

* * *

**Chapter Three: The Rain from Spain that Came**

Quidditch is one of my least favorite things about school. This is chiefly because Natalie is on the team, and so practice always detracts from our hang-out time, and when I go to games, there's nobody to joke with, because she's flying around on a broom. Of course, I've never told her that. I try to be a good, supportive friend, and wear a pin with her picture on it on my cloak at the games, and cheer really loudly for her with Alice. But it's just not my favorite thing about school. I'd much rather be doing essays for Charms in my warm dormitory with a mug of chocolate and Natalie next to me, laughing about the stupidity of the Marauders and joking about her crush on Sirius.

But nevertheless, the first Quidditch game of the year was looming near. It was almost November. The weeks had been dragging on in such treacherous boringness that I almost welcomed the arrival of the Quidditch season.

Classes were more tedious than ever. Janna and Annie were driving me nuts with their mooning over the oh-so-sexy Head Boy, and Annie enjoyed making out with James right in front of me, standing directly in front of doors I needed to enter or people I wanted to talk to. It was a sickening sight.

Rhanda and Carolyn took to winking at me whenever we passed in the halls and James was nearby. Naturally, this increased my dislike for the prat.

Study group was awful; I think Natalie was beginning to fall out-of-like with Sirius, which was a big deal, after her very longtime crush on him. He and James seemed more perverted than ever, and had outrageous conversations right in front of us about the most obscene things. Kelso even commented that they're comments were getting out of hand. One study group day, they began joking about shagging McGonagall. I won't delve into that any further. Just believe me when I say it was disturbing.

True to my word to McGonagall, I was behaving, but it wasn't easy. The first two months of school were awful. And now it was time for Quidditch. Kill joy.

On the morning of November 1, Natalie was up early, nervously pacing the dormitory.

"Ravenclaw's really good," she kept saying, "But we're good, too…Just as long as it doesn't rain."

"There won't be rain," Alice announced from her bed sleepily. "It was on the Wizarding Weather channel. The rain's been focused mostly in Spain. It's been amazingly dry everywhere else, but Spain's flooding with rain and wind, taking the brunt for us, I reckon."

"See, Lee-lee?" I yawned. "No rain. Now shut up, please?"

She threw a shoe at me and I hid under my covers. (Now do you know why I hate Quidditch? It makes my best friend madly dangerous!)

Natalie didn't seem cheered by the good news, and continued to pace nervously. Afraid of another shoe being hurtled at me, I remained quiet and tried to ignore her pacing and get a few more minutes of sleep.

Unfortunately, Alice gave up on getting more sleep, and the sound of the shower in the next room washed away any chances I had of getting more shut-eye. Annie gave up, too, and went to find James, probably to give him a nice little good-luck snog session. Therefore, I was forced to get out of my warm bed as well, as Natalie was driving me nuts and my bed is right by the wall next to the shower.

Janna sleeps like a rock. I don't think that even a stampede of hippogriffs could wake her up. I unconsciously glared at her slumbering form as I fumbled around my section of the big closet us girls share, in search of my warmest sweater and my short jean skirt that actually isn't freezing cold to wear in cold months.

If only I could sleepas soundly as Janna. Ah well.

* * *

I had a ton of time to get ready for the game, so after showering, getting dressed in my favorite Muggle 'Saturday' clothes (a jean skirt and a yellow sweater), magically drying and curling my hair and going through my usual beauty routine (it's pretty shortI'm not real big on makeup). I adjusted the amber necklace I always wear, and then slipped on my fuzzy yellow slippers and crawled back into bed with a novel I bought a few Hogsmeade trips before. It was a collection of short satire, all of which revolved around a witch named Malfunda and her house elf. I found it to be quite humorous, although I could only read it in short intervals, otherwise I got bored with the rather dry humor of the book.

Natalie was now dressing in her game robes for Quidditch: deep scarlet with gold clasps and lettering on the back that said 'N. THOMAS' in large, bold calligraphy that glittered gold. Her braids were tied back with a red ribbon, and her brown eyes looked worried. Before she zipped her robes up, she stopped in front of the mirror and let her game robes drop to the floor, leaving her in a white tank top and black warm-up pants. As she eyed herself critically, I set my book down and raised an eyebrow at my best friend.

"What's wrong?"

She ignored me for a minute, her hand running over her flat stomach, smoothing out invisible flaws.

"Lee-lee?" I said softly, sitting up. She jerked a little bit, as if she'd just noticed my presence, and smiled at me, but her eyes were far from happy. Natalie's played Quidditch for ages. I was confused about why this game had her acting so out of character.

"I'm fine, Lil," she said, smiling. But I knew better. Tossing my quilt aside, I stood up and embraced her. As she clung to me, now clearly not fine, I whispered,

"What's wrong, Lee? I know there's something…" Natalie shrugged miserably.

"I truly don't know. I'm just so scared about today. Which doesn't make sense. I've done this before…But something's got me worried. Like something bad is gonna happen."

I pulled back and looked at her quizzically.

"You're a pro, Lee-lee. And you're amazing at Quidditch. Best Keeper ever. What could go wrong?"

She laughed a little.

"Yeah right." She laughed some more, but then her dark eyes became serious.

"What is it?" I asked seriously. I still didn't buy the bad omen crap.

"It's not a big deal. I just have the normal butterflies…and I got, like, zero hours of sleep," Natalie said, shrugging nonchalantly. "Probably 'cuz I was thinking about that idiot _'Padfoot.'_" She spat Sirius's nickname with such contempt it took a moment for what she said to register with me.

"Is that why your so nervous to play?" I asked, my left eyebrow cocking up in shock.

Natalie shook her head, and she shrugged her muscled and toned shoulders helplessly.

"I don't know why that would make me so nervous. We've played together for years now. I really don't know why I have such fricken awful butterflies."

"Don't think about Sirius," I said firmly. "Don't think about him for even a second. You can do better, Lee-lee. Focus on the game, and kicking Ravenclaw's tail feathers into the lake." Natalie laughed at my little pep talk and squared her shoulders and set her face. Her eyes were still worried, but she was masking it well.

"Shall I repeat that?" she joked.

"You'd better," I said solemnly. "Now let's go eat. You need some energy for the game."

She pulled her scarlet robes on over her clothes and fastened them firmly. Then she turned to me and grinned a little.

"If it _does_ rain, I guess I'll regret wearing this tank top. Especially with my hot pink sports bra."

I laughed and shook my head.

"You won't regret it when Sirius's eyes pop out of his head and every boy in school confesses his undying love for you," I said.

"Shut up," she said, apparently irked by the mention of the Bighead.

"Oops, sorry," I said.

"I suppose I forgive you," Natalie said with a halfhearted grin.

I pulled on my sneakers and then opened the dormitory door.

"Wow, an indentured servant. Why don't you mention bigheads and insult me when I'm PMS-y more often?"

I laughed.

"As you wish, m'lady."

"You're such a nerd," Natalie laughed. All worry was gone from her eyes now. Pleased, I replied,

"Learned it from you." She scowled at me, and then we burst into laughter.

Linking arms, the two of us headed down to the Great Hall, where scrambled eggs and cinnamon porridge were waiting.

* * *

Alice and I walked out to the stadium with Natalie, and wished her luck, giving her quick hugs and last minute words of encouragement, before she headed off to join the team.

As we searched for a spot in the Gryffindor stands, Annie and Janna smiled and waved at us in a less-than-friendly way.

I looked at Alice.

"You want to sit with them?" I asked in a low voice. She shrugged.

"Why? Is there a better spot?" I doubted it, but began to look around anyway.

"HEY LILY! ALICE! OVER HERE!" We turned to see Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew, the two non-Quidditch playing Marauders, waving for us to join them.

Alice and I shrugged at each other.

"At least they seem to _want _us to sit with them," she muttered as we made our way to them. "Janna and Annie didn't seem keen on the idea."

She was right about that. Annie's rather possessive of James when they're dating, so sitting by her during her boyfriend's big game would probably promote some bad sparks.

Alice and I squeezed into the seats in front of Remus and Peter.

"Hi, guys," I said politely.

"How are you two?" Alice asked pleasantly. Always the polite one, that Alice. I stifled a grin.

"I'm doing pretty well, thanks," Remus said vaguely. He smiled at me, and I felt an uncomfortable squirm as I randomly remembered our first kiss. He'd smiled at me in a very similar way just a few minutes before it happened…

"How about you, Peter?" I asked., pushing thoughts of me and Remus aside.

Out of all the Marauders, Peter Pettigrew seems to be the most displaced. James and Sirius are natural bad boys, and Remus has a wild streak, as well, but Peter…he's a wimp. A clingy, whiney, annoying, pesky boy. He looks something like I always imagined Humpty Dumpty, the one from my book of nursery rhymes, who sat on a wall. He's plump, with an egg shaped head and dark blond hair that's a little messy, like James's, but not as bad. He has light blue eyes that always water, so it looks like he's always crying, and he's really pale with very red cheeks. I don't think he'd be all that bad looking if he lost some weight and did something about his watery eyes. He has soft features that are almost feminine, but they suit him, because he's very meek and sensitive. He worships James. It's rather sick. But then again, he and James _are _related, somehow. Janna is James's first cousin. Her mum is James's dad's sister. I think Peter's mum is their parents' cousinor maybe second cousin. Not sure. So Peter and Janna and James are second cousins or maybe third. At least, that's what Janna said. But Peter is nothing like James and Janna. They're confident and cocky and driven and smart. (or at least think they are.) But Peter struggles in school and lacks confidence. His hero is James. So he clearly has some mental problems. (Alright, that was mean of me, I'm just kidding...kinda…) But I'll give him this: he's a pretty nice kid, and seems like a really loyal friend.

Peter was grinning cheerfully.

"I'm fine," he said, a furtive smile crossing his mouth. "I think I'll go get some drinks. Anyone want something?"

"I do. I'll come," Alice said. "Would you like me to get you anything, Lily?" I shook my head.

"No thanks. I don't see any point in eating right after breakfast." Alice smiled.

"And that's why you're a twig," she said, grinning at me.

"Could you get me a butterbeer?" Remus asked Peter, and handed him a few coins. Alice and Peter left, leaving me with Remus sitting behind me, and an awkward silence set in.

Once again, my mind was screaming AWKWARD. Probably because it was _super_ awkward times twenty-one.

"So how's everything going, Lily?" Remus asked. I turned on the bench so I was sitting with a shoulder facing him.

"Eh, it's alright. How about you?" (I hate these types of conversations, where you ask questions you don't really care about the answers to, just to be nice.)

"I'm alright." He smiled nervously, and out of the corner of my eye I saw him look around uneasily. "So how do you like our new professor in Charms?"

I shrugged.

"He's okay. Charms is my best subject, and it was hard to go from an experienced teacher to him…he knows a lot and stuff, but he's not very good at teaching in a way that fit's a variety of students' learning styles." Remus nodded, and I smiled at his grayish-blue-green eyes. They're so pretty. I could get lost looking at them. I'm not sure if they're more blue or green or gray, and it's easy to get lost trying to figure it out. His light brown hair was combed over to the side, with a right side part. It was growing out a bit like Sirius's, curling up on the ends. It looked really nice. And he didn't look as tired and worn out as he had the previous week today.

Remus is a couple inches taller than me, and he's probably a few pounds underweight, like me. I've always found him fairly attractive, but sometimes he gets really pale and tired looking, and that's when his appeal plummets. Today, however, he looked awake and alert, and nicely colored.

And I was irritated to recall just why I had been so attracted to him back in fifth year, right around the start of Quidditch. Oh Merlin. Bad omen.

"So, Lily?" he said, suddenly getting really shy.

"Yeah?" My heart suddenly began to thump like a rabbit's foot. Why the hell was wrong with me? And what the hell was up with _him_? Why had his voice gone all soft?

"I was wondering…" His face turned red, and progressively grew redder and redder in the silence that followed.

Oh Merlin. I knew what was coming…

His gray-green-blue eyes met mine, and I saw something that caught me off-guard in those strangely colored eyes. I saw a bit of the awkward nervousness he was revealing now. But I also saw determination and a glimmer of excited hope. However, the most shocking thing I saw at that moment was a look of admiration and love-well, not love, really, but more strong like, I suppose, for me. That totally threw me. And then his words tumbled out like vomit.

"Lily, I've missed you so much since last year. I really want to get back together. Will you go out with me again, just so we can be sure of whether or not we're right for each other?"

I stared at him for a moment, my eyes wide and gaping. His shy approach had dissolved, and Remus was now looking into my eyes earnestly and hopefully.

I glanced away quickly, trying to collect my feelings and emotions.

"Remus, I-" But I didn't finish, because I didn't really know what to say.

"One butterbeer," Peter announced, handing Remus his drink.

"And a bottle of water for the skinny lady," Alice said with a grin, handing me a tall plastic bottle of red water, glittering with gold bubbles (for Gryffindor, obviously).

I grinned and thanked her. I love the random, cool merchandise that can be purchased in the magical world.

"So guess what I just heard?" Alice announced.

"What?" Remus asked as he tried to pry off the cap to his butterbeer.

"Rhanda Filch was recruited to play for Ravenclaw. I think it was as a Keeper."

"Really? Why didn't she say anything?" I said, surprised by the news.

"Well, Blake Corner was freaking out, because a Chaser got all nervous and chickened out this morning, and Rhanda heard and agreed to join the team and play today, with absolutely no practice, so Blake switched over to play Chaser, because Rhanda's better at Keeper."

Remus and I exchanged shocked looks.

"That sucks for Ravenclaw," he said.

"Rhanda's a tough kid. She'll do fine," I said.

Alice looked thoughtful.

"I guess it has it's advantages for Ravenclaw, too, though. Because Jay's been preparing Gryffindor to play against Ravenclaw with Blake as Keeper, and honestly, he's a rather crappy Keeper. So if Rhanda's better…"

We continued to discuss the different pros and cons of the change as the stands filled up and became jam-packed with fans from all four houses. Eventually we were forced to stand up, as people were crunching us from all four sides.

"We're about to start," Remus said, consulting his wristwatch.

Right on cue, a voice rang out through the stadium.

"Morning, Hogwarts, and welcome to the first Quidditch game of the year!"

"Who is that?" Peter asked us, standing on tiptoe and trying to see who was commentating.

Last year the Quidditch commentator was Hagen Avery, and he was an obnoxious, biased Slytherin bigot. But he'd graduated in June, so there was a new commentator this year.

Alice and me stood on out toes as well, trying to see who was over in the commentating box with McGonagall. But Remus stayed put.

"It's Alec McGovern," he said.

"Whose she?" Peter asked, looking confused.

"_He_ is a Hufflepuff sixth year," Alice said.

"And a Prefect," I added.

"He loves Quidditch, but can't play worth beans," Remus announced. "So he was recommended to replace Avery this year. He told us about it in Study Group."

"I hate Study Group," Peter suddenly groaned. Alice rolled her eyes. She was in the Magical Medicine Study Group. Peter had been placed in the group last minute, because he still didn't know what he wanted to do after school. Alice said he was the biggest whiner ever during their study hour, and although she could tolerate him normally, Study Group was hell with him.

Alec McGovern's voice continued to echo through the stadium.

"Today's game is between Gryffindor and Ravenclaw! Last year Captain Blake Corner led Ravenclaw to win the Quidditch Cup. However, with many old players graduated, Captain Corner is playing with a new, much younger team this year. However, the team is rumored to be extremely talented."

And then the royal blue clad Ravenclaw came speeding onto the Quidditch pitch.

"Here they come: Captain Corner leading, followed by Filch, Redding, Bloom, Jones, Kisor and Boot." There were loud cheers and catcalls from the Ravenclaw stands, and a few scattered boos from the Gryffindors.

"And here comes Gryffindor, led by Captain Jay Thomas, followed by Natalie Thomas, Black, Gideon Prewett, Fabian Prewett, Higgins and Potter. Gryffindor has a fairly mature team this year, with strong, experienced players. The only newcomer to the team is Chaser Amanda Higgins.

"And now captains shake hands…"

I watched from the stands as Jay and Blake shook hands unsmilingly, and grinned to myself. Natalie's older brother cracks me up sometimes, with his serious, 'win or die' philosophy of Quidditch.

"Madam Hooch is pep-talking the teams…and they mount their brooms, and here we go!" Alec yelled.

"He sounds pretty excited," Peter sniggered. I rolled my eyes and watched as Natalie shot up and began guarding the goal posts. I glanced at the opposite end of the pitch, where Rhanda was doing the same.

Argus Filch, the greasy old caretaker at Hogwarts, was watching the game from the pitch, a rake in hand. He loves Rhanda, although I would've thought loving anyone was not part of his character.

The Gryffindor Chasers are Jay, Fabian Prewett and Amanda Higgins. Jay and Fabian have played together for years, and are both in seventh year and extremely good. I watched Amanda, who looked like she was in third or fourth year, as she accelerated through the air, and wondered if she was good.

"I wonder if Amanda Higgins will be any good," Remus mused. I was surprised that we were thinking the same thing, but tried to mask it. This proved unnecessary, as Peter chortled.

"If she plays as good as she looks, then I'll bet she's a good one," he said. Alice and I exchanged raised eyebrows, and Peter laughed at his joke.

Rolling my eyes, I looked back at the pitch.

"And Gryffindor's Natalie Black blocks a nice shot from Kisor…Jay Thomas and Fabian Prewett make a swift comeback, using their five years of experience to their advantage. Some say the two have played together so much they can tell exactly what the other is about to do…and Fabian shoots," I watched Rhanda anxiously. "And Gryffindor scores the first points of the game!" Alec roared.

"This commentator sucks!" Peter snorted.

"'Cause he's not a bigot Slytherin?" I snapped. Peter shrank back a little, his watery eyes apologetic.

"No, I just meant…"

"Ten-zero, to Gryffindor," Alec boomed.

Gideon and Sirius were swinging their beater clubs jubilantly, and I watched in horror as the Ravenclaw Beaters sent the bludgers right at the two unsuspecting idiots.

See why I hate Quidditch? I don't know why Natalie's so obsessed with it.

Sirius and Gideon didn't realize what was happening until they were nearly knocked off their brooms. Fortunately, Jay yelled at them and they moved just in time. It looked like Sirius got scraped on his arm by the nearly fatal ball, and I actually heard him curse from my seat.

"And Kisor makes another shot, and…he misses again. Higgins now has the Quaffle and is approaching the goal posts. She passes to Jay Thomas. He shoots…and misses by a huge margin. Wow, that sucked." There were indignant shouts from my fellow Gryffindors all around me.

"What was _that_?"

"What in the hell is Jay doing?"

"That was a worse shot than my grandmum would make!"

I watched anxiously for another half hour as Natalie and Rhanda defended their team's goal posts. Jay kept missing, which was very out-of-character for him.

"What's wrong with him?" Remus groaned as he missed for the seventeenth time. "Has he been inhaling pixie dust again?"

"Pixie dust?" Alice repeated, confusion apparent in her eyes. Let's just say she's pretty ignorant about such things.

"It's dust sprinkled by pixies," Peter explained.

I tried not to sigh too irritably, and tried to explain better to my friend.

"Nasty! Who would want to inhale that?" she shrieked when I finished.

Peter looked uncomfortable. Remus kept his face expressionless and acted absorbed in the game, although his blue-green-gray eyes were on the wrong side of the field. Rolling my eyes, I looked pointedly at the two, and then at Alice.

"Just really stupid people," I said.

She grinned as Remus and Peter colored a bit, and we both had to labor hard to control our laughter.

"Higgins scores the first goal of her Quidditch career, making the score 80-70, Gryffindor leading by ten points."

Cheering with everyone else, Alice and I turned our attention back to the game.

It took ten minutes for the score to change again, this time Ravenclaw adding ten to their side. The game was tied.

I hate Quidditch. We've already established that. But being competitive and all, I must confess I love to watch the game once I get into it.

Natalie was having a rough time. Rhanda, too, but I wasn't really worried about her. This game was certainly not my best friend's greatest. So when Jay called a time out, I considered running down to talk to her. But the timeout was so brief I didn't even have time to think anymore of it.

"James had better get that effing snitch soon. It's nearly lunch," Peter said.

"And Gryffindor seems to be making some mid-game switches," Alec announced. "Natalie Thomas and her brother, Captain Jay Thomas, are switching places."

"What the-" I gawked at Natalie in shock. Why had they switched?

The game continued, and Natalie actually adjusted well to her change in position. She later told me she just wasn't having a "Keeper day." Whatever that means.

"And Jay Thomas blocks three consecutive shots from Ravenclaw," Alec yelled. "Amazing!"

Yawning, Alice checked her wristwatch.

"Did I just feel rain?" Remus suddenly asked. Groaning, I held out my hands. Sure enough, an instant later I felt little pellets of water hitting my palms. Cursing, I glanced back up at the pitch.

"Potter'd better get that Snitch soon," I announced.

"Oh he will," Peter said confidently.

* * *

A minute passed.

I felt all the curls in my hair begin to fall straight.

Another minute passed.

My eyelashes felt like sprinklersevery time I blinked water flicked off them.

Five minutes.

My hair got all stringy from the excessive water being poured on it. At least my skin was still dry.

Ten minutes.

Or not…

Twelve minutes.

I think my hands were turning blue.

Fifteen.

And my arms…

Twenty.

It's official. Hypothermia. Well, not really, but you know.

* * *

About a quarter of the fans left after half an hour of rain. Gryffindor was having a bit of trouble dealing with the wet weather, but Ravenclaw wasn't doing too splendid either.

Natalie was desperately working with Fabian and Amanda to score, but Rhanda was doing an amazing job blocking shots. However, Jay wasn't quite as skilled with Keeping as he was with Chasing, and let a few Ravenclaw shots in that Natalie would've caught.

"With the score at 150-100, to Ravenclaw, things are looking up for Blake Corner's team, but it'll all boil down to which team catches the Snitch," Alec said.

I was freezing cold. I cursed myself for being thick enough to wear a skirt in November.

"That's it. I'm leaving," Alice announced. "Wanna come, Lil?" I did want to, but I had to see Natalie through this game.

"No, I'll tell you how it ends," I promised. "See you, Al." Nodding, she left.

Fifteen minutes later, Peter wimped out, and said he may come back if the game was still going after drying off and getting a raincoat.

So Remus and I stood, drenched through and through, watching the game.

* * *

Ravenclaw called another time-out. As the teams left the pitch for another break, Remus turned to me.

"Hey Lily, I'm sorry if I was too forward earlier…" I looked up into his blue-gray-green eyes in surprise.

"You weren't too forward," I said.

"Oh, good. So…" He looked at me questioningly. What was he looking at me like that for? I thought for a moment. Oh yeah. Dung. Maybe just play dumb?

"So, intense game, aye?" I said, flashing him a winning smile. He blinked, and continued to stare incredulously at me.

"So, about earlier," Remus finally said, speaking slowly and ignoring my previous comment completely.

"Oh…yeah?"

"What do you think?"

"About going out again?" I asked. He nodded, looking relieved that he didn't have to ask all over again.

"What would James say?" I asked softly. "Will he get mad at you?"

Remus blinked again. I wished he'd stop doing that.

"I don't know," he said honestly. "He's going with Annie now, though, so he shouldn't"

But he was interrupted by Alec's booming voice as the game resumed.

"And time-out ends, and the players return to position. The score is currently 210-140, Ravenclaw leading by 70 points."

The Ravenclaw section screamed gleefully.

"Screw them," I muttered, angry that we were losing. _James'd better catch that Snitch soon…Where was he? Just flying around lazily? Gurrr...

* * *

_

Another half hour passed. My stomach grumbled loudly as Natalie made a hoop for Gryffindor. Cheering with everyone else, I scanned the field for James. And then I realized he was actually speeding across the pitch.

"They've got it!" Remus yelled excitedly, his voice barely conceivable over all the other cheers and cries of the crowd. "They're chasing the Snitch!" James was on one end of the pitch, soaring toward the middle, where a glimmer of gold glistened in the rain. Danny Boot of Ravenclaw was on the opposite end of the field, speeding for the Snitch as well. The stands went silent as everyone watched, frozen and entranced with the Seekers. And then the Snitch twittered a little, and zoomed a bit to the left, right for

"POTTER CATCHES THE SNITCH, SCORING 250 POINTS FOR GRYFFINDOR! GRYFFINDOR OVERCOMES RAVENCLAW, 390-210, WIN TO GRYFFINDOR!" Alec McGovern yelled over the sounds of the crowd.

And then the rain began to pour down ever harder than before. Everyone in the Gryffindor stands was jumping up and down, cheering. I joined it the yelling and cheering, and turned to Remus.

Caught up in the moment, we embraced excitedly, jumping and yelling as we did.

And then, as he started to pull back, I did something very unlike me, and I pulled him back toward me and kissed him soundly on the mouth. It just seemed right at the moment.

He didn't react at first, probably stunned by my suddenness, and I started to pull back, wondering what in the hell I was doing, but then Remus's hands were wrapped around my waist and he was kissing me back, hard and passionate, better than I remembered any previous kisses with him being like.

So I take it he didn't mind my forwardness?

And as I quite enjoyed the rather long kiss that followed, I realized what my answer to his question that had dangled in the air the entire game would be as soon as we pulled apart.

* * *

_Whew! That took a while to belt out! Sorry guys! So, quick clarification: I know the whole James position thing is sort of confusing, and that he was actually a Chaser according to Jo Rowling (and she would know) and the movie said he was a Seeker, but I'll explain it all later in the story, so please just roll with the whole Seeker thing for now, ok:) Thanks!__

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**Replies (with hugs!) for Rad Reviewers:**

**KMK: **Thanks for the review! You've been a good and faithful reader! I'm glad you like it. :)

**lupinlovereva: **It'll be R/L for now, but it'll change to James in a while. That's weird that it popped up for Remus/Lily… Thanks!

**Shimmer of an Angel: **Aww, thanks for the review!

**The all mighty and powerfulM: **Brownie, aye? Creative…mind if I borrow that?

**Lela: **Events in this chapter will point to one, but later on things may very well change…

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**Next Chappie: **

Lotsa drama, but not the heavy, sad kind. And lotsa hormones...Let's just say that Remus and Lily have some glitches to work out in the renewed relationship, and their friends have opinions, as well.

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_Questions, comments, testimonials all welcome! (in other words, please review? It'll make me_ ever _so glad!)_

**Thanks a ton for reading :)**


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